“Broke” My Ass: The Big Lie Killing America One Excuse at a Time
By: The Mayor of Funkytown — Patron Saint of Raised Fists, Velvet Ropes, and Calling Bullshit When Bullshit Shows Up Wearing a Diaper
Let me paint you a picture—American as apple pie, but rotten underneath.
We’re told we can’t afford healthcare.
Can’t guarantee Social Security.
Can’t pay teachers a livable wage.
Can’t fix bridges, fund public transit, or keep a damn water pipe from poisoning kids in Flint.
Why?
Because—we’re “broke.”
That's the go-to excuse from the suits in D.C. every time someone dares to ask why the richest nation in history can’t take care of its people. "We’d love to help," they say, "but the piggy bank’s empty. Sorry, peasants."
But let me ask you something, Funkytown:
If we’re so broke, how is it we always have a cool trillion dollars sitting around for the Pentagon?
And how is it we manage to hand out $5 trillion in tax breaks that almost exclusively benefit the rich, the powerful, and the already unreasonably coddled?
I'll tell you how.
Because this country ain’t broke.
It’s being looted.
By the same bastards who sell you bootstraps while they parachute out of failing companies with eight-figure bonuses. The same crowd who scream about the deficit when it’s time to feed hungry kids, but go radio silent when it’s time to approve another no-bid defense contract.
America isn’t broke.
America is rigged.
We’ve got CEOs paying a lower tax rate than their secretaries.
We’ve got billionaires stashing fortunes in offshore accounts while roads crack and veterans sleep in tents.
We’ve got lobbyists writing policy while teachers buy their own chalk and Band-Aids.
Want to know where your tax dollars are going?
They're being sucked into a black hole of defense contractors, corporate bailouts, fossil fuel subsidies, and golden parachutes. And when you ask for a crumb, they call you entitled.
They’ve got cash for tanks but not textbooks.
They’ll fund jets that can’t fly but not insulin that saves lives.
They’ll write checks for war but bounce them when it comes to peace.
And the worst part?
They’ve convinced you to be okay with it.
Working people—folks juggling rent, groceries, and gas—are defending billionaires like they’re on the same team. As if Jeff Bezos is gonna roll up to your BBQ and hand you a stimulus check. Newsflash: He’s not. He’s too busy building a rocket escape pod for the apocalypse he helped create.
This is class warfare.
And we’re not just losing—we’re being played.
You want to fix the country? Start here:
Tax the rich. Not someday. Not maybe. Now.
Slash the Pentagon budget. No, you won’t be less safe. You’ll just be less ripped off.
End the corporate welfare scam. They don’t need subsidies—they need consequences.
Invest in people, not profits. Healthcare, education, housing, green energy—that’s patriotism.
Because here's the raw truth:
The only thing we can’t afford is to keep believing this bullshit.
To every politician peddling the “we’re broke” lie:
You’re not fiscally responsible. You’re morally bankrupt.
To every billionaire getting richer off our suffering:
Enjoy your wealth while you can. Funkytown’s watching—and we don’t miss.
To every regular person who’s tired of being lied to, bled dry, and told to smile about it:
Stand up. Speak out. Organize. Strike. Rage. Rebuild.
America’s not broke.
It’s just been stolen.
Let’s go take it back.
If you dig the Mayor’s groove, subscribe and share. Funkytown needs more citizens who give a damn.
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